Why the blue ticks?
I’ve always thought, if I’m going to ignore you, you might
as well know that I’m ignoring you. And some may ask, what did I do to deserve
your ignoring? You did nothing. I know you did nothing. And for now, I don’t
want you to do anything.
… You know that feeling when you’re on both ends of the
spectrum? You mind the blue-ticks, you don’t mind the blue-ticks; from other
people of course, and sometimes, maybe most times; you’re the blue-ticker to
some.
Yeah well, Grey ticks haven’t always been my thing. I mean,
I have a couple of friends who show you the grey ticks. And when I think about
why they do that, there’re just a couple of things I can say.
Most of us have them. I have them. Not one, not two, not
three either so say a couple of them. To me, they don’t really know how you’ll
handle it. So whether they’re ignoring you, or not, you won’t know. And when
they’re talking to you, it’s because they want to.
Just like life; stories have breaks. I like to call them
‘breaks of reason’. So every time during my break of reason, I think. Mostly,
it’s thinking about the action I want to take. You know, in life, we don’t have
breaks for some things. For most people, it’s mouths. They love to talk, they
thrive in stories, and they thrive in the human connection of stories.
I get it, you want to know why the blue ticks. I should have
thought better and go straight to grey ticks. I mean, sometimes, ignorance is
bliss. I could also say that I love the colour blue, and that’s why I like to
see blue ticks. I know that you know, I don’t think you should know. However,
I’ll do this once. It’s not ignorance. And if that’s what you think, then so be
it.
It has nothing to do with me being mad or angry at you;
maybe, not interested at that particular moment, phase or time. You know, Sometimes,
I don’t know what I want but I sure as hell know what I don’t want. Sometimes,
it could be, not wanting to leave my bed, not wanting to write, and not wanting
to respond to your message in the midst of many others. I may not want to break
a promise or admit that sometimes, I am afraid.
I once saw in a friend’s status, ‘life is like a maze…’ and
I added, ‘… and in each phase, a passing stage’. If you’re patient… well and good. And if you move, I know what
I’ll have to say if I ever choose to go back.
Blue ticks, more than anything, is my way of telling you,
‘not now’. I don’t mean for you to develop a grudge or something like being
mad. I mean it, not now. Haha. At the end of it all, we should hope one thing. ‘That
we’ll get better.’
©Emma K.
Inspo: Leave
me alone by Khaligraph Jones
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